This blog started as a whim. I was flipping though channels on TV and happened upon one of my all time favorite movies. I watched it and suddenly discovered I was Iris! A woman who discovered that she was not the leading lady in her own life. With the help of an elderly neighbor, she finds her gumption and we are left assuming that she is on the path to becoming the leading lady she has always wanted to be. I had to get the feelings I had out, so I opened my laptop and started this blog.
2012 was the year for me to start becoming the leading lady in my own life. It was challenging in so many ways that those around me couldn't see because the struggle was within myself. I knew I had that person somewhere deep inside me, but I had pushed her away so many times that I had to go find her again. But, very slowly, she came back.
It hasn't been easy. When you have taken a backseat to the feelings and opinons of others for so long, there are going to be struggles in relationships. It is a bit unfair to change who you are, but it's even more unfair to deny who you are to yourself.
I have noticed similarities in the people who have struggled with the changes. They are the people who have been the most critical of me in the past--as if my supporting role in their lives was more important than the role I held in my own life. Some continue to struggle. They continue to point out all my flaws and how my actions are interferring with their lives. I approach them with as much compassion as I can, but I simply can't go back.
So, my friends, this is the year of GUMPTION! That single word has become my battle cry. When I am feeling weak, I say this word quietly to myself. Suddenly, I am reminded of all the lessons I have learned. I know that others can only have power over me if I allow it. I know that I am not perfect, but I am continuing to learn and grow every day. I know that I have people around me who like me for who I am.
Most importantly, I know that I deserve to be the leading lady in my life.